i don't know and i've said it a lot but i seriously am tired.
i've been thinking about killing myself a couple of times for the past few hours but honestly i dont have the courage to just slide the thin blade through my veins for all the good things to come. it hurts quite bad, they say.
i just want to disappear, tho. it hurts and it tires me out much already. i want to just pass out for a couple of days but then i'll be told that i cant take care of myself much enough. i want to run away but i'll be told that i've given a bad label to everything and it won't be a good image to see.
so i think die would be the easiest way.
and after everything, no matter how much i've chanted "you are stronger than this" only teen top's baby u that stopped me crying a couple of seconds ago.
its pathetic, its desperate. but i am desperately in need of a little taste of happiness right now that i don't even care these guys don't even know that i'm exist. they make me happy.
a lot of things going around lately and i feel like exploding.
no one would understand, tho. since judging is the easiest way.
some people might think this is a crying for help, some people might think i'm seeking for attention.
i don't care about those who think for the second, i'm exhausted and i just need to let this out. no one read this blog anymore anyway.
she's probably right. i'm worthless. i'm useless.
i probably really should proceed with cutting myself to death already.
P.S: how can i not love them when they make me laugh when no one else does?